By Alliance Communications Coordinator Amy Durr
Each New Year barrels in like a party guest — is it your very best friend in the world in a silly Santa hat or your Great Aunt Bethany with a jello mold full of kitty kibble? Either way, here’s the deal: it’s your party. You’re in charge. Buckle up and own it.
Will your January festivities revolve around diets, gym memberships or an avalanche of plastic storage bins? Fantastic — if that’s what truly excites you. Not so much if they’re just “shoulds.” I should drink only water this year. I should save $500 every month. I should start meditating. Suddenly the to-do list spirals, and so does your stress.
Who Says You “Should”? Let Things Go in 2025!
My adored therapist always reminded us to get rid of as many shoulds as possible. Start by asking questions about your shoulds – I bet you can get rid of more than you think.
Ask Why: I should fold the laundry. Why? Will harm come to me or my family if I don’t? Are the people I live with capable of folding their own laundry and doing a “good enough” job? Can everyone live with wrinkly t-shirts? Can I be okay with that? (Hint: Yes, you can.)
If there are shoulds you just can’t shake, try turning them into “want-tos” by shifting your mindset, uncovering hidden opportunities, or finding ways to make them more fun. Wearing a silly hat (or a tiara) never hurts and sometimes is the missing ingredient for joy.
Be Present, Not Perfect: A Revolutionary Approach to Januarys
Writer Alfred James says he begins the new year without any resolutions or goals. His only “goal”? Being absolutely present, and absolutely positive about how great the coming year is going to be.
Do Nothing: “Enter the New Year with zero pressure on your back to do anything other than remain open to the possibility of your potential, receptive to change and ready to show compassion to yourself for your shortcomings.”
Kickstart the New Year by Doing Whatever You Want
One New Year when things were particularly bleak, I decided to welcome 2012 by doing all of the things I wanted to do in the coming year.
On New Year’s Day, I read a book, cooked good food, went for a short run, drew in my art journal, wrote in my commonplace book, and played a game with my kids. Then, for dramatic flair, we each wrote a wish for the new year, folded them into little paper boats, lit them on fire, and set them sailing on the lake. It was energizing.
Be You: Make a list of things that genuinely fuel you. Things that make you feel human again. Pick one to focus on, or map out how to sprinkle them through your year. No paper boats required (but highly encouraged).
Personal Sustainability: Transforming Ourselves and Our World
One lens to view what I’m talking about is personal sustainability. Though most people don’t think about sustainability this way, it’s how I try to live and work at the Alliance. An essential component of our movement for sustainability, health, equity and kindness is personal transformation, which is essential for creating a fair, flourishing world.
Hopefully you’re able to apply this lens at your workplace as well. Reinventing our lives flows into reinventing our workplaces, communities and world.
Envisioning and Buckling Up for Action
Having a vision is invaluable. I love the vision of the Alliance and it helps me frame the world I want: To co-create a healthy, just, equitable, thriving, kind and peaceful world that works for everyone, fulfills their fundamental needs and realizes our greatest dreams of sustainability.
It’s dreamy and beautiful, and it reminds me to keep envisioning worlds that could be, and then finding ways to step into those worlds.
We are all playing a long game, running a marathon, walking each other home. Our greatest dreams of sustainability begin with us, you and me, caring for ourselves and then others in every place we inhabit.
Here’s to freeing ourselves from shoulds and being fully present, not perfect, in 2025.